Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
Just checked my phone. Sometime last night I googled sex positions in a tent. Was there even a tent there?
Year anniversary in a month. Think I'll just give him a COME ON MY FACE FREE card. I'm both broke and shameless.
Siri just reminded me to pickup Plan B
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
We just left the shoe. An app card to Fridays. $25 to santoras and a note that said sorry we were drunk on the front doorstep of the strip club
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
He was asleep with his head on a windowsill and you were petting his head, then you almost left the kitchen and then went back to pet him some more.
Well I just took a pregnancy test... So how's your thanksgiving?
God dammit everything I said last night about jungle juice being awesome just does not carry over into the next day
Just stole my moms weed, left a note saying sorry.. Hope she isn't mad.
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
I woke up in a bathtub full of green and blue Nickelodeon slime! wtf?!
Randomize
