Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
her facebook's as public as her vagina
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
STOP SETTING ME UP WITH GUYS YOU MEET ON CRAIGSLIST
You know i love you, but i just cannot fuck you until your eyebrow grows back. It's too hard not to laugh.
Ran up to the dollar store to get batteries for my vibrator. Happy Valentines Day!
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
Seriously considering taking a nap at lunchtime in my car. That. Hung. Over.
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
Randomize
