She told me she only masterbates to Kenny Rogers songs.
OMG. What did u say?
I told her I did too.
I'm not to broken up about it. Our relationship was worse than a coldplay song.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
Do you remember unrolling paper towels as a blanket?
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
Not yoga, whiskey. Totally mis-typed whiskey.
Hatred of squirrels is the least of my hereditary problems.
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
He offered me handsanitizer after a hand job, you can't tell me he's not perfect!
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
The last thing I need is a possessed urethra.
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
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