and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
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This is sufficient.
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
At least I cut out the pieces of your hair where I braided gum into it last night. Thank me later.
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
I just recognized Courtney in a crowded Trader Joe's solely by seeing her ass. In other news, I survived the first round of layoffs today.
I'm not sure which feat is more impressive...
So after he broke the crutches and got us kicked out of McDonalds, we stole a bike and when we got back to the hotel, he jumped out the window into the bushes.
Yeah when he is drunk, he seems to think he is Captain Americas Canadian counterpart, Captain Canuck
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
How is it possible that I'm still a virgin and you've managed to have sex in a cheetah print onesie TWICE
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
Yah. I'm gonna lay you down and feed you grapes, except I'm gonna replace grapes for my balls
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
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