absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
One of the bamboo sticks broke and impaled him. I think he's drunk enough that it shouldn't hurt until tomorrow.
Its 6 am and me and the girl in the next apartment have been taking turns puking and yelling "never agaaaain" thru the walls.
What color are my eyes?
Ummmm... 34 C?
I'm crying at a bar by myself drinking a pear martini drawing things dicks are scared of. How was your day?
tell me you did not just describe yourself as "hot and bothered"
I was so drunk that I passed out before I could do or say anything I'd regret. My low alcohol tolerance is like a guardian angel.
My hand smells like rave and peanut butter.
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
I was left to my own devices with nothing to do but drink
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
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