I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
you pissed in the sink and didnt realize it until it was time to wash your hands
Ohh god. I'm so nervous. This is terrible. He just introduced me as "the best girlfriend of his life" and Jenny as his "sexual roomate"
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
I've decided I'm gonna attack people with the toilet plunger.
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
I'm in the fetal position watching the little mermaid and trying not to die. When do you come home?
just woke up on a lounge chair wearing a durag and holding burrito wrappers in my hands
In the morning when you read your texts, just fyi you showed up at my house drunk off your ass and shoe less and demanded I go to the bar. You need Jesus.
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
Are you ok? Who pooped in my office?
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
Randomize
