laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
Hello rock bottom. My name is Jared. Nice to meet you.
which gay bar do you need a ride home from?
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
Please tell me your aunt didn't see the Brita pitcher full of condom wrappers. We had at least 100.
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
You thought you were drunk? I woke up at 6 o'clock this morning with a cheeseburger in my left hand a drink in my right with my window half way down. it was raining.... fml
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
I met a guy last night who bought me a book on Amazon at the bar and then we had sex. Boners for books is a thing. Boom.
The hat, the beard, the hard posing - like who does he think he is?
A bag of dicks
That's dating life
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
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