Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
4 words: hood of his car
And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
It's too hard to jack off and hold an ipad at the same time
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
Green mimosas i think yes
His penis smells like laundry I just wanted to cuddle it
Wrapped in a blanket, just ate a whole party pizza. All my dreams are coming true and you don't even care.
I'd like to request an "its my birthday discount", and for you to bartend shirtless tonight ;)
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
He seems like a nice guy. I mean, I know he's married and he's essentially paying me to be his side hoe, but he really seems like a good person.
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
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