Walk of Shame. In a state park.
Thank you for leaving pool of vagina on my girlfriends carpet.
Dude. Hurry up. They just blessed the tequila.
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
It's barely 9 am & I've already had an ice cube IN my vagina
I am currently listening to someone take a shit. I hate the hole in the ceiling.
not much sitting here stoned eating my little sisters halloween candy and judging each individual hersheys candy bar and after much deliberation by the selection committee the original hersheys chocolate bar won
I thought turtle was a code word for weed until he pulled out a baby turtle from his pocket and said "$20 for a turtle"
Ok so you know that's gonna be legally viewed as kidnapping, right?
We joked about how funny it would be if he got pulled over with 300 breakfast burritos in hus car. We walk outside of the school just as the police lights turn on and pull him over
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
How does the curb feel today?
It's stronger than my elbow. But I found my lighter while I was down there.
Randomize