After a valiant attempt at golf, I think it's time for Tiger to go back to doing what he does best- having sex w/ blond, white women.
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
not to be a dick but do you remember the names of all your friends i made out with after we broke up?
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
If I weren't her cousin I'd take advantage of her and this low point in her life.
I ate a pepperoni off of someone's floor last night. We need to talk.
when seducing a hipster, do you think taking a nude pic on a lomo-camera app would increase my chances? grainy off-colored boobs and telling him how much i like reading salinger?
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
He told me I look like a librarian today. I hope that means he has a librarian fetish or something
Disregard. He says he said I look "agrarian" today and just proceeded to compare me to Mumford and Sons. Fuck it, I'm going home and drinking
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
I'm all set for mothers day, I let her beat me in beer pong.
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
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