you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
Can we have a celebratory fuck now that the lockout is over?
You're the best girlfriend ever.
I just woke up to three dick pics. Apparently in my blacked out state. I was asking for them as the new valentines day card.
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
HOW DO YOU FORGET TO FINISH WINE
I almost rear ended this hot guy driving a Porsche Cayenne just so I could get his phone number
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
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