If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
you only like me because i go down faster than a bridge in minnesota
We pay for beer, you give birth. It's how the world works.
At dinner I grabbed his hand and he screamed "mom she just grabbed my penis" the proceeded to shove my hand down his pants! Hello Mr.Dick!
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
I don't remember much of last night. But I woke up with very apologetic texts from him this morning so apparently I didn't get laid. Which is stupid.
WHO THE FUCK PEED IN MY BONG
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
You went outside, peed in the front yard, and asked me to bring you some toilet paper.
Lobby closes at 2 AM on Thursday, but everyone walking still wants food... I could run a "Taco Bell Taxi" when I clock off at 2 and charge a dollar to give drunks a ride through drive thru.
Someones thought of a way to afford tuition.
Randomize
