you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
oh my god its dad's weekend for the sororities i can't wait to throw up in front of all these parents
apparently he's bringing me two things i like. he said one was him and i'm assuming the other one is his penis
I will never swim in a flooded basement again..
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
Nothing says 'good morning' like waking up only to realize this chick was watching you sleep. She's crazy
She is crazy, dude. She actually bit me on the gootch.
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
You merely adopted the alcohol. I was born into it. Molded by it. I didn't see the hang over until I was a man and by then it was only blinding.
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
Randomize
