I made her dinner: Beefaroni with grated parmesan cheese on top. Luckily she showed up drunk and gave me head, "For spending so much time preparing."
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
It was like giving head to a cactus.
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
omg i wish you could see the front of my car.
There's literally a dust print of your body and your arm trying to hold on and the other one where your fingers visibly dragged down the hood.
The last time I've felt a woman's touch, the twin towers were compromised. You can wait like one week
As you passed out you started to cry and say "Mufasa" over and over again making everyone else cry.
You are the jesus of drinking
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
I blame everything on you. My broken heart, my fucked up liver and my twisted mind.
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
Randomize
