moral of the story: I'm going to stab everyone
i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
MISSING: One left eyebrow. Reward if returned.
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
I just told him he had gained a new brother. He immediately knew I meant the eskimo kind.
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
I was in a bad mood so I guilted her into giving me $100 on a weekly basis and now I feel bad but I don't know how to tell her I hustled her
Let’s be real here. NOTHING says Real Adulting like rolling a J on your line of credit paperwork.
Randomize
