And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
it was like brushing your tongue but with a fucking long toothbrush.
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
Dignity is for republicans.
She just looked down there and said "i breed horses. this is better than anything ive ever seen."
sooo....i just remembered that someone fed me a pretzel out of their purse at the bar last night.
A worker across the alley is wearing your sombrero sans cat barf.
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
I'm being fed tequila grapes by a girl on stilts...
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
Taking Gomer to the ER. He tore something trying to stretch his nutsack enough to put his balls in his own ass. I need new friends.
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
Do you remember standing up at 3 in the morning and asking me if I was counting to six?
Randomize