let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
they came at us with fireworks while we were skinny dipping in her jacuzzi at 4 am...
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
Sometimes you have a life bucket list item checked off like 4 tits in your face simultaneously and getting to bang them both. I'm sorry I bailed on skiing but not really. Coming over with a boombox playing 'heat of the moment' as soon as I can hail a cab cause I'm too drunk to drive still...
He gave me twenty cool ranch tacos and declared, drunk, " Look, I do good"
I was originally going to go as fembot from Austin Powers
I wanted to have tiny guns for tits
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
MY INSIDES ARE BASICALLY BEING WRUNG BY A CHAINSAW IM NEVER TAKING PLAN B AGAIN
Just woke up from an extremely erotic dream featuring Steve Buscemi. Now I can't sleep.
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
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