Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
My hair reeks of homosexuality.
so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
I have glitter on my penis. Do you know anything about this?
She turned over and said "You smell like my dad, i just can't do this"
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
i have a picture in my phone of you with a bottle of tequila in your back pocket. i believe you were saying "pocket of champions" or something along those lines
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
Remember when we used to go to the bathroom to do drugs together? Now it's to help you with your spanx.
First time at a gay bar. I found a surrogate AND sperm donor! The surrogate is straight, so it evens out.
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
Randomize
