so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
I think my penis and your vagina just became best friends last night.
just tried to pee in the sink at wendys...need to stop letting my drunk habits get into my sober life
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
*swallows 40 gallons of heavy water and astral projects into buzzfeed* Top Ten Reasons Why I Am God
I mean, I'm not upset that HE's getting married, I'm upset his penis has to go through with it by default
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
