I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
I mean I drunk but not enough to handle a Scientology convention
I found a pair a guys underwear in my purse that has a British flag on it and says and I quote "British beef" what.the.fuck.
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
and then I drunkenly screamed, "you can ride that Uber all the way to revenge city!"
which was funny until I realized I paid for my enemy's cab to go fuck my ex
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
COKE WAS NOT ON THE ITINERARY FOR TONIGHT.
Family acid trip. They're welcoming me into the family.
What. The. Fuck.
Family acid trip.
I don't know why, but whenever I shave my balls I feel more aerodynamic.
Randomize
