You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
The chick working the drive through at BK on New Years stuck her head out the window and told me there were no line ups for the bathrooms inside so i should go in there. I just kept squatting and peeing and told her it would prob help business.
She's calming us down by shoving oreos in our mouths
Playing nyquil pong with a cat again
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
I'm gonna tell the medical examiner that your cause of death was over-arousal.
someone at the bars was yelling at the bouncer to let him in because he "just passed through the 7 levels of the candy cane forrest" soulmate?
go meet him and give him your number.
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
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