remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
I wanted to dispute a few 411 charges on my phone bill. The service rep told me I called them four times asking for Lady Gaga's number.
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
I just melted my phone trying to make cookies. I think that's a sign.
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
when I came to get Jamie there was a cop standing outside with her, made me roll down my window to tell me "she's got to go cause she won't keep her shirt buttoned"
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
i thought you were just a really comfy body pillow until i sobered up. oops.
Finally had sex in the new kitchen. Burnt the hamburgers and hit myself in the face with the freezer door. Worth it.
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
I'm keeping him.
Sex was good?
I had to tap out three times. There aren't words for how much better than "good" that is.
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