he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
God gave him joint rollers for hands
Straight up if I get stuck with her I'm going to drink myself into a prison cell.
Things I learned last night: 1. Bacardi 151 is a one-way ticket to the toilet, 2. It is possible for a human being to turn into Mount Vesuvius
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
I just want to let you know how hung over I am today and I fucked a girl in a kangaroo costume last night.
Ps I'm glad our relationship hasn't progressed into having to get married so we legally can't testify against each other
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
Whatever you do tomorrow don't let me put on the Borat mankini and yell "POLAR PLUNGE!!" while diving into the pool
The pool is covered.....
Like that would stop me.
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
Randomize
