I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
we made a giant pot of alcholic jello. i filled a gallon bag and brought it to dorms. desk guy gave me weird looks, he doesnt realize this is how i will pass all of my room searches
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
When I was with my girlfriend I was averaging 1 random hookup a week. In the 2 months I've been single I haven't got any. I think I need her back.
lesson learned: don't narrate out loud about how a girl is giving you head while she's doing it
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
I made that picture of you my lock screen. So I've just been standing around at work licking my phone all day.
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
so the casino kicked my ass last night, i'm pretty sure i hit a new level of hungover....just showered with my sunglasses on because the bathroom light is too bright
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
I thought it was your cat but I was wrong your Roomba is possessed by a pissed-off evil spirit.
Randomize
