Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
WHY are the edges of my bra charred???
Well if all fails we can always become surrogate mothers. I hear that pays well.
That's the kind of break up sex that keeps couples together. Damn.
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
Only thing worse than going to work with a hangover is going to work with a hangover then realizing that u don't have to work that day
I could fuck to npr.
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
I made a booty call at 3:30 am on a Monday... I think I just became the ultimate female fuckboy. I don't know whether to be ashamed or get myself a trophy.
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
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