dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
yo im tryna cop a beej tonight
theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
How do I introduce myself to her without coming off as "the guy who jacks-off to her profile pic"?
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
Drinking heavily at 3pm and about to rescue a 30lb street turtle. Dont even bother attempting to rise to this level bitch
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
I spent last night dying strippers pubes green and landscaping shamrocks. That is why hands look like I squashed a leprechaun.
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
i just remember singing the theme song from 2 and 1/2 men to my hair
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