Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
Do your friends by chance have our inflatable deer head?
Nevermind, it's in the dryer.
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
Pitting the remainder of the bottle against my hangover. I'm expecting an all out cage match for my soul and wellbeing.
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
You were mean to me and you broke my heart and hurt my feelings. You dont get to talk to me about Peter Dinklage
At this point all my Tinder matches are telling me I'll be fucking the whole male population of UMass '17.
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
Throwing up into Nora's potty chair while simultaneously having beer shits was truly the highlight of my Christmas season.
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
Randomize
