Goal for tonight: Make one last drunken mistake for the semester.
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
I'm proud of us, I'm cleaning up the place and I haven't found a single beer can that isn't empty.
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
at this point every shot is just a haymaker to my liver
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
Last time we talked he was trying to sext me but he was including pictures of fruit
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
Everyone says I win the strip club
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
wait i saw you last night?
we found you ass naked on the couch covered in pillows.
Randomize
