shit I'm tired of wearing other peoples clothes to bed
I closed that bar. Sang every Beatles song in the book. Made Somoan friends.
Clearly he doesn't understand my need to be surrounded by cats at all times
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
FUCK... Pulled a chick from the bar went to her house passed out on the shitter. She lives in a house full of girls. They were making poop jokes as i left
I can't believe he just friend zoned me like that.
Dude, you're not even gay.
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
Randomize
