i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
Gonna be late. Someone jumped in front of our train.
Umm went to talk to a client ended up seeing his semi erect penis. This is my life.
i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
And we won't even have to pay the tab if we die AT the bar. So..win win.
I gave up on alcohol forever for like 2 hours, that's got to be a new record
So mom called me from the hospital laughing her ass off. Apparently my sister is allergic to cocaine...
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
So she just had an emotional breakdown over a birthday card with a peacock on it. Yeah. She's pretty drunk, but we made it home safely.
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
Okay she just told me to turn the volume down on the fan. What does this even mean?
His bedroom is the preferred destination of MILFs, cougars, recent divorcees and sexually frustrated wives
His penis is my hero
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