I puked in a mailbox on the way back from your house.
apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
I just saw grafitti that read "Mug The Fart Eater". Really, Memphis? That's all you've got?
Youll never guess who has to go to fucking planned parenthood because trojan cant make a fucking condom
you insisted on breathalizing me with a inhaler.
You never realize how many sex toys you have until you have to strategically hide them while moving out of your dorm.
After you took the handle off the bathroom door I had to coach the Scottish guy sitting on the toilet, throwing up in his own lap, how to put his pants back on. Yes, I think he won the drinking game.
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
First stoner thought of the day: Life would be so much better if there were more things that were biscuits and gravy flavored.
Randomize