Whod you bang
My cat gives me a boner
you don't know how close you are to someone till they ask you to shave their ass.
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup.
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
I went outside for a smoke at 4 and things seemed normal. It's 6 now and the front lawn is COVERED in tortilla chips. WTF?
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
Been in the ER for 3 hours now. This hospitals transition to paperless is not going well. But my doctor looks like Elton John and just gave me percocet
Everything's fine I'm just stoned and my pillows are too soft.
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
Randomize
