I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
Sometimes you just gotta fuck a has been local celebrity for your 15 minutes.
When you put my balls in your mouth i just want to buy you expensive gifts...you know what i mean?
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
She just sent me a message. It's a poem, about eternal love, that she wrote, about us. Just because I took her home two nights - doesn't mean it's eternal love.
Mark my words I will never date another cop again. I don't care if he's JESUS.
So apparently it wasn't anything really bad, it's hemorrhoids. Which is the medical word for butthurt. I actually have ass ointment.
I'm literally in the bathroom for two minutes and I walk out to a random dude with his face in your tits
So this morning when I woke up. I found my refrigerator open and no more food. It was empty, I'm home alone for the week. Where in hell did that food go?
I took advantage of the fact that my mentee had to go to the bathroom to throw up in the other stall. I'm going to hell for being hungover at an elementary school.
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