Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
i can't wait to kiss dudes with my vampire teeth in.
I said I wanted my dignity back. He brought my thong to me after sharpie-ing "dignity" on the front. I'm not sure if I should me mad or impressed.
If you stick your dick in my spaghetti, we're fighting.
we need to drink more beer. the fridge wont close.
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
Why are there so many fucking Lambchop puppets hidden around my house?!
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
I just got a snapchat of a flaccid penis with the caption "happy belated valentine's day." What did I do to deserve this
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
Randomize