Lesson 1: you can't keep macking on a girl if you get handcuffed
i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
my little brother just asked me why i have handcuffs. How do I tell him that his sister likes being taken advantage of in the bedroom?
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
Lots of alcohol last night skiing this morning = me throwing up off chairlift
playing nyquil roulette. it entails taking shots of nyquil and hoping it doesnt kick in during sex or in public. game on.
Do you know how disconcerting it is to hear the sound a dog makes while it drinks water and find out that it's someone eating you out?
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
Celebrated the veterans I suppose, my mouth tastes of gin and black outs
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
Randomize
