Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
I can tuck mytits in my pants
Just mADE A PArabola og urine
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
I mean I gotta puke to be skinny, wax to be hairless, and drink to be fun. Life isn't easy.
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
Woke up this morning with seven juice boxes under my pillow and an empty box of condoms In my pocket. Good night.
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
Took out half a tooth with a handle of jim beam last night. Apparently I can't walk and chug bourbon at the same time
There was definitely a significant amount of cookie dough in my bra
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
I found him in the kitchen singing German metal into a banana while simultaneously mixing brownie batter. He didn't have any pants on.
I think I ingested my vampire fangs last night.
I planned to shave today but it's Friday the 13th I might cut something
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