guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
I feel like a fucked a broomstick last night. You get a gold star.
Just disregard the tooth in the plastic bag in the fridge.
Between my vibrator and my iPhone carpal tunnel is inevitable.
His penis makes me feel like a mystic dragon sliding down a turbo slide covered in white gumdrops and sour cashews
Same.
All I could think about when I saw her was that she could be the mother of my future first round draft picks
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
You better keep a close eye on your uterus tonight cause I am looking good.
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
Reminder to self: never have sex on a trampoline. Trampoline burn hurts worse than carpet burn.
Randomize
