Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
Oh man. Realized I was high when I realized how long I'd been watching Roseanne
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
I have reverted to folding laundry while watching porn. how much sadder can my life get?
I told her the job opening requires being on the phone during the week and on my face on the weekends. I think she wants the job.
Jerry got outside again, i found him making dirt angels in the garden. I need to put a bell on that bastard.
I asked her how many times she came and she said "Oh god I can't count that high, Rutgers doesn't teach us that."
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
Sorry my phone died because I decided charging my vibrator was way more important
So, I gotta figure when the nurses at the emergency room noticed my new hair cut it means I'm there too often, right?
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
Randomize
