Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
I'm glad my gym is open 24 hours..I stopped in on my way home to puke from the bar
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
Hey, I didn't ask that stripper to put her unds in my mouth, it was just covered by the plus package fee I ordered.
Hey is there a picture of me in a trash can on your phone?
I just farted a soft, gentle fart and it made me think of the eye puff glaucoma test at the eye dr. I hope that's not fart air they use for those. And yes, I'm texting you from the toilet and yes again, I'm high.
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
Went home with a dude from UF last night. Just dripped chicken onto my phone and then licked it off. Going to pick up a bridesmaid dress. Mid 20s in a nutshell.
i think we sleep fucked last night...
Not sure she's stomping around my apartment muttering incoherently about wanting to speak to the colonel
I'm not going to tell you how to live your life, which includes naming your schlong
Dude... this pee is not alleged
YOU SAT ON MY LAP!
Wuddup pee lap
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