I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
i'm in his phone as sushi coochie
I banged her roommate when she was gone. She came back with a chicken sandwich and a bj. Then she said " smells like my roommates vagina" I think I can get a threesome tonight
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
They left me stranded on the side of the road with a table and five gallons of water. They said it was all I really needed to survive. People are staring
first party of the semester tomorrow. thinking of wearing a huge sign that says "my summer was good" to avoid the 67 questions and get straight to drinking
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
Pretty sure keeping my vibrator in the same drawer with the weed makes it work better. I fall asleep almost immedi
He slept outside in his hammock, and then took a lawn chair with him in the shower because he was too drunk to stand up.
You think that was bad? One time my parents found my sister half naked on top of the four runner in the garage. She makes me look like the good child.
skipped tacos for a blowjob. No tacos. No blowjob. More importantly...no tacos. Wtf?
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