what is it about summer that misdirects my moral compass so much?
Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
I fell asleep on the air hockey table and someone turned it on, scariest shit ever when you're that fucked up
I wouldn't even cut tickets or put ppl in jail I'd just hand out punches to the mouth and Liam Neeson throat chops
New drinking game: Drink while you Drink. I'll explain the rules when I see you, needless to say, it's not difficult. Unless you enjoy sobriety, humanity and life. Bestest.
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
Randomize
