i just ordered an al pacino with double mocha at starbucks.. i'm waiting to see how long it takes the chick to realize what i said.
no. you can't hotbox the world.
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
Scratch one off the douchebag bucket list. Just saw a guy in a sesame street tshirt and a tap out hat. Didn't get the memo that big bird's trying to get into mma.
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
Hi I am too sober and out of rum. Translation: I owe you some beer. Also, get better taste in beer.
I had to hypnotize my roommate last night so there's that.
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
Is it bad that if I found out I couldn't have kids I'd be more pissed that I've been using unnecessary condoms than the fact that I'll never be a mother?
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
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