i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
Bad news: I had to be at work at 7:15. Good news: no one had used the bathroom yet so I got to defile a freshly cleaned stall
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
At least drunk me was smart enough to stash toilet paper in my bag before I started my walk home. Finally countless squat pees and wiping with grass taught me to be prepared.
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
Jail wasn't bad. Was poppin Xanax the whole way there
You get drunk and try to bury your girlfriend in the sand JUST ONCE and all hell breaks loose
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
I really just want to eat 20 mcnuggets and slap everyone with the box when I'm done.
I know we were going to go hiking today, but I don’t think I can face reality until Wednesday
Why did I wake up with BYOB sharpied on my stomach
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
Just got caught by my boss looking at porn on the work computer & he decided to utilize this time to look with me. Not sure if this is good or bad.
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Randomize
