Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
He looks too sensitive, like he's going to write me a poem and cry after the first time we have sex.
Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
Just woke up. First thing I see: Little brother eating last night's jello shots thinking they're reg jello.
I told him to go down on me and when he did he started crying!! I asked him why and he said my vag looked just like his ex girlfriends!!!
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
All she kept whispering was put your pickle in my mouth. Then she fell out of her barstool and chipped her tooth
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
I feel like I deserve an award for facing my fear of penises in my face.
the only two hours i was sober on this trip and i managed to break my toe. no one will believe this.
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
Apparently i'm now known as the kid who was double fisting tequila and pedialyte.
Randomize
