she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
It's an "im going to have to shit with the lights off" type of morning
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
I'm drunk, we're losing, and I'm in the visitors stands. This is about to get ugly.
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
The other night he asked if I had a condom and I said I had an IUD. and he goes OMG A BOMB?
He left weed in my bong for me this morning. What a guy.
I ended up changing her contact in my phone to "O Great Potato".
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
Randomize
