How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
what if every blade of grass was a penis?
god, you should never be in the FBI. you'd give away america's secrets to any boy who asked.
Nah, I'm just going to keep fucking him until he realizes we're perfect for each other.
two fat guys on crotch rockets just invited me to 'party' with them at a del taco. why does this keep happening to me?
Gong!
YOU'RE MARRIED NOW YOU CAN'T KEEP GONGING ME WHEN YOU GET LAID IT DOESN'T COUNT
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
My phone just autocorrected 'vagina' to 'vaginihilation'...when exactly did I need to convey total annihilation by lady parts??
It was like getting a handjob from a frost giant
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
You know the party's good when you say "Never have I ever caused an emergency landing" and someone drinks
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
I'm so stoned. We're making Josh's sister bake us brownies. She's so small and pixie like. Her brownies make me cry tears of happy.
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
Randomize
