I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
Ya know what's been the best part of this College Football Season? Not having to hear Brent Musberger say the Honey Badger 77 fucking times.
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
If not, I can murder my liver twice...it's like a cat, it has 9 lives
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
Excuse me. I’m a mature responsible adult.
You got your arm stuck in a vending machine trying to get fruit snacks.
I had a cast on my hand and if I paid for my fruit snacks, I’m getting my fruit snacks.
Randomize
