I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
i feel like im doing the pre-walk of shame..like every car that drives by is like, ooooo look at that girl, in that itty bitty dress, yep shes about to get her skank on tonight...
I was excited because I thought I didn't have to tell you about the crabs, but surprise! You got em!
The man at the Honda dealership told me I smell like vodka and probably shouldn't be driving.
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
I'll just put on a bunch of mascara and cry right before I get there. Then everyone will recognize me.
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
Randomize
