I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
Rylan was made in your driveway. Just thought, as godfather, you should know.
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
apparently the 911 operator took drunk dialing waaayy too seriously
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
I'm drinking whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
our flight took off 8 am and the bar didn't close til 5, so we decided it was a good idea to just stay out all night. Drunk logic is awesome. We were all scared we wouldn't get let onto the plane
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
To be clear, the next time I wake up with your dick inside me, I will reach down and grab one and squeeze until it pops like a grape. You've been warned.
I want to be your penis for a week.
Let me get this straight, you're telling me to lower my standards? Even though last week you told me I don't have any..?
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
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