Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
Apparently you walked through my house with your dress on your head
ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
I finally had sex with him last night, but we used a condom so it doesn't add to my number of sexual partners.
we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
Bring your kids so they can distract our kids so we can drink beer in peace.
I apologize in advance for attempting to drunkenly hookup with your sister
Couple of things: my nipples are blue and knowing that at some point I'm going to have to poop is incredibly terrifying
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
How was my night? He had a picture of his mom on his night stand and he yelled "Papi like" when he came. Fuck tequila.
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
I wore sunglasses to take a shower. I might be hungover.
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
Randomize
