he started yelling "squirt for me" then his girlfriend knocked on the door and told us to keep it down
i'm not really understanding how she couldn't figure out it was him
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
Is "you left your socks here, please come get them" a good way of saying "come fuck me?"
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
Just checked my voicemails on the work phone on speaker. Thank you so much for the one of you screaming "COME FUCK ME NOWWWW!" my boss loved it ..
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
Showed up to family party blacked out and in a turkey costume. I'd say thanksgiving was a success.
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
The cop told me I was the prettiest guy he'd arrested in a while. I'm still not sure if it was a come on or not.
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
His exact words: "I don't have anything you can't treat with antibiotics."
I HAD SEX WITH COLBY AND HIS FIVE YEAR PLAN IS TO STEAL A REALLY EXPENSIVE PAINTING AND ASKED ME IF ID BE INTO HELPING HIM AND I WOKE UP IN HIS BED TO A WOMANS TUBE TOP NEXT TO ME
I think you threw up on me last night but i can't remember so i'm not mad at you.
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